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Mens Quotes

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  • Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work or prison.
    - Tim Allen

  • I love the lines the men use to get us into bed. 'Please, I'll only put it in for a minute.' What am I, a microwave?
    - Beverly Mickens

  • When I eventually met Mr Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.
    - Rita Rudner

  • My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
    - Tim Allen

  • Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later, for another thing, they die earlier.
    - H. L. Mencken

  • He was so mean it hurt him to go to the bathroom.
    - Britt Ekland (on Rod Stewart)

  • Men are simple things. They can survive a whole weekend with only three things: beer, boxer shorts and batteries for the remote control.
    - Diana Jordan

  • Perfect numbers like perfect men are very rare.
    - Rene Descartes

  • A succesful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A succesful woman is one who can find such a man.
    - Lana Turner

  • Man - a figment of God's imagination.
    - Mark Twain

  • The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
    - Robert Benchley (My Ten Years in a Quandary, 1936)

  • I've dated men my age, younger than me and older. The only difference is the young ones are quicker at taking out the garbage.
    - Lara Flynn Boyle

  • I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.
    - Zsa Zsa Gabor

  • Bad men live that they may eat and drink, whereas good men eat and drink that they may live.
    - Socrates

  • The true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman, as the most dangerous plaything.
    - Friedrich Nietzsche

  • Talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours.
    - Benjamin Disraeli

  • I like to wake up each morning feeling a new man.
    - Jean Harlow

    Mens Quotes Page 8


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